love

Love is a verb.

Society tries to define what the word Love means. There are songs written about it, movie storylines that revolve around it, books and soap operas, all with the theme of Love. We are surrounded by a misconception of Love.

Love is great. Don’t get me wrong.

“He is so wonderful. We just ‘get’ each other. He is so great! I love him.”

I was that stary-eyed teenager with the misconception of love not all that long ago. (Well, it was quite a while ago. Let’s be real.)

He was the only one I saw. He could do no wrong. He made me laugh. I dreamed about him, cried when he went away…

That’s Love, right?

Well… Kinda.

I will admit, although my concept of love was very limited, I did truly love that boy. I still do to this very day. With every fiber of my being.

But my love has changed. My view of love has changed.

Love is action. Love is a choice. Love never gives up. Never.

Sometimes Love is hard. Sometimes you have to say you are sorry. Sometimes you need to forgive, even when the other person doesn’t say they are sorry.

Sometimes love is hard.

Love is unselfish.

Even when all I want is my own way, I need to choose Love. Even when what is best for the other person is not at all what I want for me. Even when I have to go sit in the mud and muck with the other person.

Even when it sucks.

Because what I did not truly understand at the beginning stages of Love was that it WAS going to suck at times.
There would be a time when your sick child pukes all down the front of him. He takes that one for the team because he knows how much vomit bothers you. Chooses to Love and hug that puke-soaked boy with all his might and kisses his nasty face.

Love is a choice.

There will come a day when the man you love leaves for war. You will not know when or if he will be back. You will be alone with your little children.

Love is a choice.

There will come a day when he holds you as you send your 8-month-old baby off to surgery.

Love is a choice.

There will be a horrific day when the door opens and he collapses on the floor in the doorway because his best friend in the world has just died.

Love is a choice.

There will be the day when he stands beside you as you listen to your mother’s labored breathing in her hospice bed.

Love is a choice.

There would be a day when he carried the load of the family because all you could do was stare at the wall for hours and days on end because of the nightmares that came after your mom died. When you lost faith. When you lost hope. When life lost meaning.

Love is a choice.

There would be a day when he was lied about. You would defend him until the bitter end.

Love is a choice.

There would be bad days. A lot of them.

Love is seeing the best in someone when he cannot see it for himself. Love is faithful. Love is sacrifice. Love is believing in his dreams wholeheartedly. Love is patient. Love is forgiveness. Love is gentle. Love does not judge. Love is seeking out the very best for the other. Love is grace. Love is unending.

Love is friendship.

Love is true.

Love is your mom dropping everything to come help you with your kids when you are sick.

Love is a friend speaking truth to you, even though it hurts.

Love is your friend (three whole time zones away) sleeping with her phone under her pillow because you are having the absolute worst day of your life, and you just may need to talk.

Love is absolutely beautiful.

Love is watching the beaming face of your husband as he sees his son for the first time.

Love is looking over at each other with joy in your eye as you sign papers for your first house.

Love is knowing each other, really knowing each other.

Love is seeing the dreams you dreamed about for years coming to pass.

Love is seeing his potential.

Love is watching your husband shine.

Not every day will be rosy. But many, many will.

There is joy as well as sadness. Laughter and pain. The good and the bad. The triumphs and the trials. The meaningful and the mundane.

This is what I have learned about Love over the years.

It is worth it. Oh, so incredibly worth it!

Love is a choice.

Love is action.

Love is a verb.